Epic Fail from a clueless wanker...

Below is the kind of ridiculous email we Dommes receive on a regular basis. Clueless wankers pretending to be submissive and kinky when in reality, they don't know the first thing about BDSM or indeed about how to correctly approach a Superior Mistress.

This one appeared in My AdultWork inbox today - needless to say his "offer" was declined:

"I've got an idea that I think would be really fun. I was wondering if you would be interested. So if possible could I book you to randomly send me stuff by email and how I should wank to it. Then whenever you decides (needs to be before 7) you can reward me and watch me cum on skype. Would only take a minute with all that teasing :-) What do you think? How about this for about 10 credits? xxx"

So for those who don't quite get it; I'll break it down to show exactly what is wrong about this email. And there is an awful lot wrong with it.

1. Most obvious is the fact that he has failed to greet Me in the appropriate manner. In fact this is no greeting at all. He has failed to acknowledge that he is indeed speaking to a Superior Mistress.
2. He's gone straight into what he wants. He clearly has no clue about what it means to serve a Superior Dominatrix. He's thinking from his point of view only and not in terms of how he can satisfy the needs of Mistress.
3. He wants Me to send pictures to him via email - thus bypassing the AdultWork credits system. He wants free porn to wank to and assumes I'm going to send him gratuitous shots of My body for his pleasure. I'm not - I'm not here to serve him.
4. He assumes he's going to be allowed to wank like it's his right. Again - he's focussing on his own needs and not those of Mistress. Wanking is a privilege - not a right.
5. He states I can let him cum "whenever I decide", but then dictates the time I should allow him to cum by. First; I don't have to allow anyone to cum.I don't owe anybody an orgasm. And if I was to; I would let him cum when I want and not to his deadline.
6. He demands a reward for being allowed to wank - wanking is a reward in itself - provided he has met My needs and pleased Me. So far he has done little to achieve that.
7. He had dictated the price he wants to pay for this "service". 10 credits is not the price I charge. I fact charge more and My fees are not open for negotiation. I wouldn't even wipe My Superior ass with this "offer".
8. Finally; I am not the only Domme this cretin has sent this ridiculous email to. Several other Dommes have encountered the exact same email from him. He's shopping and hoping one of us will bite. Well perhaps an insta-domme might. A genuine Dominatrix like Myself wouldn't piss on him if he was on fire. In fact; as I told him in My response; I'd much rather spread My own navel lint on toast and eat it for dinner!